Saturday, September 18, 2010

The Magic Man


I love Mr. Eraser. I know you all do too. Something that gets permanent marker off the wall? A must for a mother with toddlers. Today, the magic man achieved what I thought would be impossible. My friend and I were coloring each others' hair in an effort to save money. Thanks to my sister Julie (a hair dresser), I am able to get the professional products and professional advice. I set out towels under our chairs and everything. I thought I took every precaution because this stuff stains. After my friend left, I noticed a HUGE circle of dye that leaked through the towel on to the floor. And a long drip by the oven on the floor. And a big (about 8 inch) drip on my cupboard doors. *GULP*. First thought: Jason's gonna flip. I didn't believe the magic eraser would actually work. Obviously it did or I would not be writing a post. Instead I would be writing asking all of you how to re-finish little spots of floor/cupboards. Wow. He really is magic. Who'da thunk?



Jason is at the BYU-FL game today down on Tallahassee. He went down with some friends and his brother Ben last night. Everyone knows I am the BIGGEST chicken. Jason knows this all too well. He asked me to turn the sprinkler off when I got home from yesterday. He was already on his way to the game. I went out and he had strategically placed a snake skin on the door mat. Yes, I screamed. It looked like a real snake.



GO COUGS!!!

Then the other night we had to vacate the house at 11:30 at night with our children b/c our genius neighbor decided it was a good idea to try and shoot an armadillo (aren't those things made of armor or something anyway?) and he missed and hit his propane line. So, the firemen told us we had to vacate. Soooo....we went conveniently down the street to my moms. Sleep was lost. But oh well. BTW...I just want to add that I haven't seen that neighbor and I keep on expecting him to come apologize for his asinine behavior and for making my family vacate at 11:30 at night. RUDE. That's not the point. On to Jason and the things he does to scare me....So we went to my mom's to sleep. I won't go into details but there's been a lot of snake sitings in places where snakes should not be. I mentioned this to him on our way over. So what does my sensitive husband do? He puts a very realistic snake under my pillow. You can guess what happened. Thanks Honey!



AH.......I digress. On to what my point is......



So, like I said, Jason is in FL. Every time he goes out of town I have a sleepless night. I play out scenarios in my head of things that could happen to my children while I -seemingly-carelessly and irresponsibly sleep. Such are the thoughts of someone overtired. I review in my mind where the gun is (don't even ask....) and how to operate it, what our escape plan would be. I sleep by my phone in case I need to call 9-1-1. Ridiculous things. I thought maybe if I had a little company in my bed I would sleep better. And for some reason I got a lot of comfort from letting Lincoln sleep with me. He protected me last night. Thank you Lincoln for your bravery, smelly toots, kicks, talking, etc. I actually did sleep better.

My fearless protector.

See how strong he is?



Why do I have pictures of combat and candy and cheese, etc? Well, it's not to display our ant problem. I got all of this stuff for $27 last week. It's value was $98. In case you can't see everything there are ten bags of nestle candy, six bags of Kraft cheese, two bags of green giant veggies, 3 jars of Newman's own pasta sauce....ok, now I am bragging. I will stop. You can see. I would just like to point out though that the combat alone worth around $18. Oh, and the grapes were not on sale. I payed full price. Which was about 3 or 4 dollars. WOW!!!! Good times at Publix.

6 comments:

Rebecca said...

that's hilarious about jason putting snakes in your path to scare you. what a little trickster. i slept with ollie one night when christian was out of town. it didn't help me sleep better. maybe that's because he was only like 6 months old- not a whole lotta protection gonna happen there.

Amanda said...

I do the same thing when Jordan is out of town (like tonight). I am a big wuss because I will lock my bedroom door - jonah is on his own! I would come sleep over on Hickory Hill but after all the snake scares I am steering clear. I would KILL jordan if he did that to me.

Meredith said...

Linc is gigantic!! He looks so big to me. :(
I hate when JD is out of town. I sleep horrible the first night...always.

Jene and Megan said...

I get creeped out too when Jene's gone (like last night) but not as bad as you! I double checked all my locks and kept some lights on all night.
Look at all your loot! You'd be proud of me...I coupon shopped this week! I only used a few to get me started but I saved 20 bucks, which was small in comparison to a coupon queen such as yourself but still a small victory!! =)

Hannah Stayner said...

hilarious post! I am so glad I am not the only one who lays in bed when KC is gone and thinks of every possible thing that could go wrong. I have an escape route plan for every scenario. I even have planned dialogue of what I would say to a robber/rapist who breaks into my house (the rapist one involved trying to convince him that I am HIV positive) lol.

ok, so enough of the crazies. give your hubby a little smack on the face from me for putting you through the snake torture.

Jake and Emily Hutchings Family said...

that snake has been sitting on the ground in there for about 2 weeks. everytime i go in there it startles me. you'd think i'd pick it up, but no, that'd be too hard!